Never explain yourself to others (this article is priceless)

Mr. Nan Huaijin said: "in life, there is nothing wrong with being criticized. If you take other people's talk too seriously, you won't survive that day. "

that's true. No one says who's behind it.

living in this world, not everyone likes you, some people hate you, some people envy you, some people despise you.

We can never do that to satisfy everyone. No matter how good you are, someone will scold you; no matter how bad you are, someone will appreciate you.

Don't ask for everyone's understanding, and there's no need to explain yourself to them.

01

not anyone can understand you

Ji Xianlin said: "on the road of life, everyone is a lonely traveler."

the more mature people are, the more they find that there is no real empathy in this world, and not everyone can understand you enough.

the ups and downs of life can only be understood if you have tasted it. Others may sympathize with you, but they will never understand how deep your wound is.

even if you have a great grievance, it is only a story in the eyes of others. The only one who can really understand you is yourself.

there is such a story in ancient times.

once upon a time there was a scholar who accidentally got hurt while he was working.

passers-by cast a sympathetic look at him and asked him what was going on. So he opened the wound and told the pedestrians on the road about his misfortune. The pedestrians sighed, comforted him and left in a hurry.

it wasn't long before he died of wound infection.

We in life are very much like the people in this story. Open your own wounds again and again, longing for others to understand you, but finally aggravate your own pain.

Lu Xun said: human joys and sorrows are not the same.

only when the needle is stuck in yourself will you know how painful it will be. Whether it is good times or bad times in life, some things are destined to be borne by yourself. Instead of asking for the understanding of others, you should learn to be strong from now on.

02

other people's mouths, why care?

the ancients said: life is a passer-by, there is no need for thousands of knot.

in life, we always care a lot about other people's comments. When you hear the good, you are complacent; when you hear the bad, you are miserable. In fact, people's life is too short, why should we care about what others say?

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in the Song Dynasty, there was a Zen master who practiced with the old Zen master for many years, but still failed to realize. Once, he accompanied the old Zen master for a walk in the yard.

the old Zen master asked him, "I once passed a bridge and slipped, and my heart was immediately enlightened, so I made a song called" jazz ". Do you remember what it was?"

he replied, "of course I remember. I have a pearl, which has been blocked by dust for a long time, but now the dust is full of light, shining through thousands of mountains and rivers. "

when he finished answering, the old Zen master did not speak, laughed a few times and left.

his heart is full of doubts. Did I just get the wrong answer? Why would the old Zen master laugh at me? He was so puzzled that he couldn't sleep for several nights.

then he met the old Zen master and asked himself what was wrong. The old Zen master replied that you didn't say anything wrong.

he was even more puzzled: "then why are you laughing at me?" The old Zen master smiled again and said, "since you are not wrong, why should you care about others laughing at you?"

when he heard this, he suddenly realized that he had devoted himself to spiritual practice and no longer paid attention to the eyes of others.

"Zengguang Xianwen" says: right and wrong exist all the time, but if you don't listen, there will be nothing.

living in this world, there will always be people who judge us. Even the sage Confucius has been criticized by others for thousands of years.

the ancients once said: no one has ever been vilified, nor will anyone be praised only. When you are alive, you don't have to care too much about the vision of others, just be yourself.

Let go of our attachment to the outside world, we will not be swayed by other people's words, and those ironic words will disappear.

03

be yourself and don't explain

there is a saying in the Book of songs: those who know me say I am worried, and those who do not know me say what I want.

people are hard to tune when they are alive. For those who understand you, you do not need to explain; for those who do not understand you, explanation is not as good as silence. Don't care about other people's mouths; being yourself is the most important thing.

in the old days, the Buddha gave a lecture and passed through a remote mountain village.

when the villagers heard that the Buddha was coming, they all came to visit. Some people worship the Buddha, but others use foul language to denigrate the Buddha.

the Buddha stood there listening quietly, smiling and saying to the public, "Thank you for coming to listen to my lecture. It's getting late today. I'm going to the next village first." If you come through here again, if you have any more questions, you can continue to ask me! "

hearing these words, the villagers were so ashamed that they never made rude remarks again.

Huai Nan Zi says: saints do not seek fame, do not ward off evil spirits, walk upright, and rest on their own.

behave well, ignore the slander of others, and those evil people will not dare to commit crimes.

be yourself without too much explanation. Because the more you explain, the more inexplicable it will be, and it will only add to your annoyance. Ignoring it is the best response to right and wrong.

those who are really wise will not live in the eyes of others, let alone in the mouths of others!

when we are misunderstood, don't rush to make excuses, time will give you the best answer; when we are in pain, don't rush to talk, because we won't.Someone really understands you.