The more afraid of those who bear hardships, the more they will suffer for the rest of their lives.
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there are two kinds of pain in life:
the first is called the bitterness of life, which is secular trivia, toil, sarcasm and harvest.
the second is called the bitterness of growth, which is active change, hard study in a cold window, hard struggle, and loneliness.
you have to choose the same between the hardships of life and the hardships of growth.
if you can accept the hardships of growth, you can avoid the bitterness of life.
otherwise, you will continue to reincarnate in the pain of life.
01
there are many such people around us who do the same thing day after day, year after year, seemingly hard, but stay where they are all the time, without any growth.
in fact, this is not called effort, it is called repetitive work.
there used to be a 10,000-hour law: after 10,000 hours of training, anyone can change from a novice to a master.
however, think about the workers who have worked on the assembly line for ten years. They have been working hard for more than 10,000 hours every day. The end result is that they are more skillful in movements and do not become masters at work or strong in life.
therefore, most people's efforts are only repeated at a low level.
the key to life's growth and progress lies in four words: deliberate practice.
repetitive work devotes time and energy to the same behavior, and conforms to the laziness and comfort of human nature, making people more and more passivated, without thinking, let alone forcing themselves to repeat a single behavior mechanically. It is a frog boiled in warm water, waiting for a rabbit, and asking for a sword.
deliberate practice is to first find the right direction to change, then restrain your laziness, follow the set path, strive to make a breakthrough every time, and force yourself to do what you should do every time. And finally adapt to this state.
this is to accumulate a small victory into a big victory, but also to accumulate small steps and even thousands of miles.
the key to deliberate practice is to get out of the comfort zone.
psychologists divide people's knowledge and skills into three areas: comfort zone, learning zone and panic zone.
in the innermost comfort zone, you are familiar with everything, and you can get everything by raising your hand.
in the learning area of the middle tier, you will feel uncomfortable because you are dealing with new things.
in the outermost panic zone, you will always be afraid because you are dealing with people and things that are far beyond your reach.
A master has a characteristic: he likes to take the initiative to go to the panic area, boldly face the unknown and challenges, and constantly force himself to a higher level, which is deliberate practice.
remember a sentence: a master never does what he likes, but does what he should do most.
of course, these are often things that we don't like.
however, the people who make you suffer are often your dignitaries;
things that make you miserable are often the things you need to improve the most.
what you instinctively refuse is exactly what you need most.
things that are more comfortable and unchallenging tend to be more dangerous.
if you are in this state now, you should be vigilant.
02
there are three realms of doing things:
the first realm: doing a lot of things you don't like in order to live;
second realm: having capital, only do the things you like;
the third realm: take the initiative to do things you don't like for the sake of progress.
A lot of people say: isn't this asking for trouble?
Yes, the core of deliberate practice is to take the initiative to find bitterness.
what do you suffer from? Eat the pain of change, the pain of panic, and the suffering that you don't like and have to face.
this kind of suffering can be called the suffering of growth.
this is life: you can either eat the bitterness of life or the bitterness of growth.
you have to choose between the hardships of life and the hardships of growth.
then why do most people prefer the bitterness of life to the bitterness of growth?
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first of all, the bitterness of growth needs to take the initiative to eat, but the bitterness of life is different. It comes when you lie still.
secondly, the suffering of life can be paralyzed by fatigue and transferred by entertainment. In any case, as long as it is still alive, the walking corpse can muddle along and finally get used to it, which can be called passivation.
the pain of growing up is that you always have to maintain a keen sense of touch and a clear cognitive mind, which can be called sharpening.
because of human nature, we all choose to eat the bitterness of life, avoid the suffering of growth, and finally become insensitive, like walking corpses.
the pain of life makes people paralyzed. Only the pain of learning makes people awake and elevate. If you do not choose to take the initiative to eat the pain of growth, you will eat the pain of life for the rest of your life.
03
in the world of adults, there is no quiet time.
Today you don't want to suffer from learning self-discipline, but you can't avoid the bitterness of life tomorrow.
the real hardship is doing everything you can for a goal for a long time.
in the process, give up entertainment, ineffective social interaction, meaningless consumption, and incomprehensible loneliness.
it is essentially a kind of self-discipline, persistence and deep thinking.
if you want to have a good body and a healthy body, you must keep your mouth shut and spread your legs.
if you want to live the life you want, you must work hard, keep rising, and work hard to make money.
if you want to enrich yourself, you must sacrifice your leisure time, read more, study more, think more;
if you don't like your present state, you should jump out of your comfort zone and try and break through.
every time I experience pain, I complete a transformation and meet a better self.
04
Mr. Yang Jiang said in his speech of one hundred years old:
suffering is a basic feature of life.
the total amount of hardship suffered by each person in a lifetime is constant, and it neither disappears out of thin air nor happens for no reason.
it only moves from one stage to another, or from one form to another.
the more you choose to avoid it now, the more you have to pay for it in the future.
if you don't want to sink into this flashy world, you have to force yourself to take the initiative to bear hardships.
you have to eat the pain of study, work, thinking, persistence and failure.
this is the greatest self-discipline of adults.